realizations

the last couple of weeks have been ... well ... a little hard to put into words. they've had their bright and shining, quiet, bleak and sad moments. to put in terms of reality: that is life, no?

my ipod is on random shuffle so right now Sara Bareilles's "Many the miles" is on. you can check out the lyrics hereL http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/sarabareilles/manythemiles.html .

its so appropriate and i'm not talking literally but figuratively.

the initial part of the move to Lubbock seemed like it would be a walk in the park....oh Jesus help me: I couldn't be more wrong. It's been beautifully painful. Not because of a singular experience or that it hasnt been easy. Relatively speaking, its more like those beautifully painful experiences were ordained for this time and this place. its humbling to say the least but more like being broken. we know that this is a wonderful beautiful but not easy or painless process.

yet that is the junction in the road that I am at. learning new things everyday and truly understanding why i see things a certain way or feel a certain way about stuff. its the next level of growing up or at least that's what I call it. the living situation is nice. i see that my study abroad experiece prepared me for it.

i'm grateful for new relationships and friends and re-kindled friendships. so very thankful for all the prayers and words of encouragement. i'm settling into a sort of routine: a school routine for sure. i've managed to figure out that my cousin, Amy, was 110% correct about golashes. I'm investing in a pair soon and possibly a canoe or raft. It floods like crazy around here. i'm more comfortable about getting around on campus and most especially about which bus goes where and how often. i also feel a little dumb because it took me a few days to figure out that the Student Union Building is what everyone refers to as the SUB. ok that was not rocket science! lol.

this new grad school experience has made me soooo appreciative of my undergrad education. I feel like i definitely got my money's worth and more.

for the most part in any free time i've had, i've tried to partake in some arts and crafts. i didnt bring any of that stuff with me so i had to purchase a new glue gun, but rest assured it will be put to good use! i've been paintining and working on the decor of my new place. gotta say its really peaceful here and i'm sooo happy with the choice made. it's a relief on so many levels as there are soooo many things to think about in this new living situation: things that i really took for granted - i might add. i'm much more keenly aware of my surroundings.

i'm also looking for a job. yes, its time to re-enter the job market. I figured 16 months was too long. i had forgotten just how time consuming it can be! good news is that i do have an interview next week...so i'm praying about it and will go from there.

i've been listening to Sixpence alot lately....and Kari Jobe and Hillsong.

tomorrow is another TTU home game and i'm thrilled! will take a break in the studying for the festivities as my parents will be here. will be interesting for sure. i also visit a new church this sunday: excited about that for sure!

ok so i leave you with, its what's playing...lovely night and wonderful dreams to you all.

"Don't dream its over"

There is freedom within
There is freedom without
Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
There's a battle ahead
Many battles are lost
But you'll never reach the end of the road
While you're traveling with me

CHORUS:
Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won't win

Now I'm towing my car
There's a hole in the roof
My possessions are causing me suspicion but there's no proof
In the paper today
Tales of war and of waste
But you turn right over to the TV page

CHORUS
Now I'm walking again
To the beat of a drum
And I'm counting the steps to the door of your heart
Only shadows ahead
Barely clearing the roof
Get to know the feeling of liberation and relief

CHORUS REPEAT UNTIL FADE:
Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in